o4.3o.12. monday

support your local auto mechanic shop.

Pearson Auto

^^^ click the link above
& 'like' the Facebook page. =)

Thanks friends. Love you all.

o4.23.12 monday.

just would like to rant for a minute about some bothersome things:
*If you don't like rants, don't read. . . & These are MY opinions.

1. I don't understand why people get married, when neither party has a stable REAL job. Like seriously? where do you plan on living and how do you plan on supporting each other?! your parents support you now! Hello reality check. sheesh. Let's get real grown up jobs and pay for our own things before we go and get married.

2. Parents that force marriage on their children. uhm. your child just graduated & just turned 18! Let them be a freaking 18 year old! Stop shoving marriage down your child's throat. They've only known the boy for two months, they do not need to start planning a wedding. Maybe they should actually go to college and get an education and or real job. I know we have to start somewhere but does anyone REALLY know what they want when they're 18?! doubtful.

3. People who have babies & can't support them on their own. In return, they move back in with their parents. They work at minimum paying jobs and have to have their family support them. And not only do they have one child, but they have multiple. You're only hurting that child, you do not have the means to have that child or support them and the things they need. Stop being selfish & get on birth control.

4. Now I know everyone thinks their child is just the cutest thing ever. & they post pictures of their child doing whatever their child does, on Facebook. okay. Yes some of my friends have babies that are absolutely adorable! and then some of my friends I'm like 'wow...' & I know you can't help what your baby looks like but. . . hmm. Let's just say people with attractive kids should be able to post pictures & those with less attractive children should be denied picture posting. . . yes it's rude. I know.

on a more positive note: KUDOS to my friends who DO have the means to have babies and support them fully on their own. I'm impressed. Also, Kudos to those who DID get married young & their marriage has lasted and they are happy & financially stable. I'm jealous of you & proud of you. This wasn't meant to offend anyone. Just getting some things off my mind, things that drive me freaking crazy that is. And for those young people who say 'I'm going to prove everyone wrong & my marriage will last' yeahhh. I was one of those who said that as well. & look where I am now. Part of one of those many divorce statistics.

Seriously people. . . seriously.

regardless of everything, I love you all.

o4.18.12. wednesday

the big D word is finalized. . . scary. i know.

& I'm a bit caught off guard at how fast things went through
& I'm a bit . . uneasy still? yes. uneasy.

But i'm making progress.
I haven't cried in a week. so that's good. . .
I changed my facebook relationship status to single
& posted a status update.
basically just appreciating those for the love & support
and discouraging any ill speaking or gossip between either party,
being dax or me.

texted my mom a while later & told her what it said.
then i said

"what an amazing and well spoken daughter you've raised.
too bad Dax doesn't do things like that to protect me
like i protect him. it's sad really."

While I know she's asleep, I know she will agree in the morning.
Wish he protected me like I make sure he is protected from others.

This life is a crazy roller coaster. . . and I thought my ride was coming to a halt.
fortunately or unfortunately, that did not happen.
Hold on pretty girl, the ride is just beginning.

o4.15.12. monday.

"gettin' along without you baby,
i'm better off without you baby.
how does it feel without me baby,
i'm getting stronger without you baby."

at least that's what i keep telling myself,
yet it doesn't seem any better.

wish things were different. . wish things were different. .

sara evans - stronger.

love her. love the song. love the words. love everything about it.
wish i could just be strong like her now. . .

i feel like it's been forever, i don't understand either.

o4.=(o9.12. monday.

if you could please listen to me.
& fix my . . .
heart. my emotions. my stress level. my . . . everything.
that would be a blessing. . .

=( zoning tomorrow, hopefully that helps.
if not, I will start counseling again soon.

I'm so depressed.
I just want to lay in bed and cry, all the time.

I can't do that. i need to get out.
i wish i could fix everything, unfortunately
I can't fix things by myself. . .

my emotions have taken over.