monday . 5 . 31 . 1o .

talk about the best weekend in a very very long time.

i love my boyfriend so much! he's perfect! ahh! i can't even believe how perfect he is. and how lucky and grateful i am that i've found him. =)

did i mention i want to spend forever with him. because i do. we had some very good talks this weekend. i feel like we're making progress. and some secrets were told, which i realllly needed to hear. =) it was amazing. i love him. so much. i love being able to tell him everything. our endless amounts of giggling. we made manicotti, or however you spell it. and we ate dinner at heidi's one night. and heidi's parents tonight. it was sooo yummy. i even tried meat this weekend. three different kinds. can you believe it. branching out a tad bit. disney scene it. movies. 'what did you drag me to?!' hahahahaha. he loved it! he loved all the birth talk. temple. smashing paintballs. who would have thunk that one could smash a paint ball with their feet?! yeah i had no idea. ha. screaming songs in the car. farewells. dax bringing a pen to sacrament meeting because he knew i would want to draw or color on the program. he knows he perfectly well. heating me up leftovers at one in the morning so i could take my medicine and not get sick. taking complete care of me all weekend long. =) ahhh! i love him so much. i could go on and on and on.

hmm. good weekend. florida next week. lets hope this week speeeeds by. i love you! night.

thursday . 5 . 27 . 1o .

i have my new obsession: 'a rocket to the moon'

yeah so in the car yesterday with shanie she had 'mr right' playing, by them. and i fell in love with it! so i came home and looked up a bunch of their songs. and i fell in love all over again. ahh! seriously. ♥ ha. i downloaded a bunch of songs. i want to make a cd for the canyon drive this weekend. but. i dont think i have nearly enough new songs. that's the suuuckie part about cd's like. you can't keep adding songs. =( boo. i just made a cd not too long ago. like right when i got my new car. and its overplayed already. ha. i find myself listening to it more than i listen to my radio. then i'm like 'what the heck! we have radio here!' and i change it. ha. but somehow i always change it back. mm. i need more music in my life.

hmm. so i have a wicked awesome bruise that keeps getting bigger on my leg. hahahaha. boo. i told my mom on tuesday 'see that bruise?!' and you could barley see it. but its getting there. each day its getting darker. by the time this weekend hits, it will be like this big purple thing on my thigh! hahaha. i can't waiiiit! i have a sick obsession with bruises. ha. i bruise fairly easily. and when you think about it. like eweee. thats a bunch of broken blood vessels. then it scares me! and i freak out a little bit. but. . . . they look cool. only on me though. hhahah. jk. ahhh.

i have like a zillion missionaries i need to write back. but i'm kind of a suckie missionary writer nowadays. sorry fellers. =( i just have no motivation. its awful. =(

so. have you ever seen those chinese lantern things? that look like this cute picture i found. i loveee those stupid things. and saw them once upon a time at a wedding reception at a golf course. like inside. and i think thats where my obsession with 'golf course wedding receptions' came to be. i want those stupid lantern things hanging all over as well! but i probably wont have them. they're probably expensive. save up thaaaat money now right? ha. i have no life here in syracuse. i might as well just work my toosh off while i'm forced to be here. uhhhahhhh. speaking of weddings, i have one not this saturday, but in a week. for my cousin. mhmm. . . . i told jenny that i'm going to be in 28 weddings before i'm married, and i'm at 3 currently. so i have 25 left before i get married. she thinks i can do it! she told me to put an add in the local newspaper. i want to be maid of honors at weddings for those girls with no friends. price : $100 for the night. also, i want my hair did all up pretty like. and the dress of course has to be bought for me. i want a closet full of dresses like that girl on '27 dresses' you just wait! it will happen before i get married!! =) and i'm content with it. also. i think i want some tanning passes to be paid for by the bride as well. i need my white pastey skin tanned please.

BRING ON FLORIDA! ahh! i can't wait. i hope i actually get some tan! stupid meds i'm on right now 'stay out of sunlight, or artificial sunlight' really dr ericksen?! don't you know that its summer time. and i can't afford to be elmers glue white?! seriously! i want to be tan, like all those pretty tan girls. one day i will be. . . one day. you'll wait and see. hmm. ewe. this medication i had to pour at work today was like glue. elmers white thick glue. it was disgusting. i'm like who drinks this?! it would get caught in my throat!! it wouldn't even come out of the bottle! it was gross. hmm.

at work today i talked to tyson about boys. mm. just one boy actually. and its probably my favorite talking to him. as much as he teases me he really helps me also.
tyson: 'if he stops calling you then you need to worry'
me: 'if he calls me then i need to worry?!'
tyson: 'no if he stops calling you! then you need to worry'
me: 'oh! don't scare me like that!!'
hahaha. it was good though. like i told him 'i know it will all work out like it should work out. but the waiting process is awful' and he was like 'yeah but really it goes by fast. like not when your in your shoes now, but looking back, you will think it did.' makes sense. like when i'm like 'ughhh. seven weeks til florida!!' and its like forever away. then all of a sudden, BAM! and its gone by already. ha. yeah. it will work out. its just a matter of being patient i suppose. tyson and jenny are def. my favorite. i can tell them anything basically and they're always there for advice. its nice. someone to finally vent to about stupid things. =) hahah. mmm. dear waiting process, you suuuck! that is all i have to say. but i'm sure when i get old and after i recieve my 28 dresses and get married, i'll look back and be like 'what the heck! time flew by' as for now. i'm like commmme on man! hurry up time! hahaha. mmm

can you tell i ramble. and have no life. i want some ice cream. except thats downstairs. andddd. that is a long ways downstairs. and i already feel like a fattie pattie. . . ewe. i need to lose some weight. i ate like a few hours then took my pill. and my tummy is not havin it tonight. ugh. please dont make me sick for tomorrow. please oh please tummy. =( i dont want to throw up all over. mmm. someone bring me ice cream. no. not ice cream. i want a rainbow from paces. mmm. they sound SO good right now. or even a shake! not ice cream. but a shake. like a chocolate banana shake. oh those are my favorite. =)

my presh boyfriend said we can go see 'the backup plan' this weekend. it just came out last weekend. and i've heard it was good. ahh! i'm soo excited! i want to see it soooo soooo bad!!!! so hopefully we go! he said we would!! =) i'm so excited! that would totally make my weekend. and my whole week has been nothing but shaaaaat. so i need this. hmm.

night babbbbies.

wednesday . 5 . 26 . 1o .

there's this song called 'letters from home' by john michael montgomery. and i heard it yesterday on the way to work for the first time in years. and i fell in love with it all over again. particularly one line in the song.

"But I'll be all right, I'm just missing you."

mm. only a few more days. that's it. =( two weeks. and its been awful. i miss my bestfriend. . . .

i miss telling him secrets. and gossip talking with him late at night while laying on the couch. i miss cuddling. i miss having that one person there that i can tell anything to, no matter what it is. i miss our little bets we would make with each other. i miss saying 'cross your heart! cross it!' and watching plenty of movies. i miss sunday nap times. i miss trying every redbox in logan city to try to find a movie, and failing. and just . . . smiling and laughing! simple things like that. i miss it soo much!

its weird. like being put in a situation where you always have that one person you run to with everything and you spend every day with. its almost like you take it for granted. and once you're taken out of that, its a big eye opener to how much that someone means to you. i know love grows, but i really think the heart grows stronger when you're away from that special someone. i know my heart has.

i miss just having him and the weekends i spend with him will never amount to everyday like it once was. but i'll take every second i can get. i can't wait til this summer is over. =(

enough sappiness. what's everyone doing tonight?!

sunday. 5 . 23 .1o .

i love my boyfriend. i love my boyfriend. i love my boyfriend. i love my boyfriend. i love my boyfriend. i love my boyfriend. i love my boyfriend. i love my boyfriend. i love my boyfriend. i love my boyfriend. i love my boyfriend. i love my boyfriend. i love my boyfriend. i love my boyfriend. times infinity. =)

*notice his ring, enough said. =)

wednesday . 5 . 19 . 1o .

//that is all.

tuesday ; 5 . 18 .1o .

so this weekend was fun. i was going to elaborate alot more. hmm. i'll just say the highlights. well the main stories. dax was telling me a story about his friend and how she was like crazy or whatever because of this medication she was on. i asked what it was he said 'prilosec' i'm like 'what? prilosec is a heartburn medication!' hahahaha. then i laughed really hard til he pushed me off his bed. =) oh that boy. i love him so much! then i asked if he meant prozac which he did. oh trying to be all medication smart like me. =) hahaha. so cute!! he's adorable. i attempted to go rock climbing at the field house with him. but it was closed. so we went to the park and the boys played basketball. and camille and i swung on the swings. i even sat through TWO boy movies. granted i fell asleep during 'iron man' but so did dax! and he didn't even snore, i'm so proud of him. =) hahaha. but i stayed awake through 'robin hood' i think it was a no go show, like i would NOT recommend it. and i dont think dax would either. he didn't seem to like it. he owes me big time though! sunday naps, and making pretzels, home made pretzels!
cuddled alot. broke into my car! after forever. ha. sang songs, well i sang songs. lots of songs and dax just said 'whats up with all these songs!' uh idk! ha. we found popcorn trees at the temple! hahaha kind of. hmm. what else did we do? we drove through the canyon to look at the stars. parked. got out of the car. and stood in front of it. and then dax scared me. i was like talking about the constellations or whatever and he was like 'get in the car.' i'm like 'what?' he's like 'get in the car now' and i run and get in the car and we take off. he had a not good feeling. which i'm glad he did. because i was scared! we had a not good talk afterwards. but it was probably something that needed to be said. just figure out what we are this summer and such. =( i did not like the talk, at all. and i will not speak of it on here. we . . . . played games at his friends house. we didn't sleep at all sunday night, awful. =( we went and sat outside the logan temple monday, and it was thee most perfect thing ever. the grass is like SO big. and our bodies just look so small with this big perfect temple behind us! i loved it. i want a picture one day! seriously! that would be like thee best picture ever. it was perfect. and they had pretty tulips! =) i took a picture.and its actually the background on my new phone. which i'll talk about later. we actually named one of the tulips our tulip. it was a verrrry small tulip baby tulip. ha. hmm. i loved laying outside the temple. it was so peaceful, even with the cleaner up workers cleaning up the flowerbeds and such. laying on the grass, holding hands. perfect. and comparing each others pupils, what a stud of a boyfriend i have. who could ask for anything better? ha. i dont think i could like do simple stupid things like that with anyone else, and love every minute of it. came home around 1:30 on monday. chiropractor after. and then home. my phone got here! and i was wayyy excited. taylor and mick helped me put it together. mytouch, and i love it so far. i'm still learning so much about it! there's so much stuff! so many apps, etc. anyways. i didn't eat at all sunday. well. til dinner, then daddy made me eat half of a grilled cheese sandwich. no appetite. on the plus side, i lost five pounds since college. =) hahahaha. whoooow! and i didn't even gain the freshman fifteen. ha. hmm. cried forever with mom monday night.

tuesday work. it was awful. managers changed. and it was just like an overall quiet day. like i think sam is the only one with the loud mouth today. like everyone else seemed realllly queit. which made the day go by SO slow. it was awful. my back killed. =( i really dont know how to fix it. after work i went to the mall and got a cute undershirt, and a shirt from ae. but i dont think i'll ever even wear the shirt. i dont like it much. its bright yellow with a jeep on it. and a surfboard. random. i dont think i like it. but it was only ten bucks. meh. after i went to victoria secrets. and i got these freaking CUTE pair of underwear for free, with a purchase. so i bought lotion and then these adorable underwear.
i only got the saying. because i dont think you really care to see ALL of my underwear. ahaha. anyways. i'm excited to wear them! whooow. hahahah. not that anyone sees them. but still. then they made me try on this bra. called bombshell. oh my heavens. they're like 'it makes you 2 cup sizes bigger' uh. yeah! it did! i was huge. and she was like 'let me see' so i showed her, with my clothes on of course! and she was like 'oh it looks WAY good on you! you have such a cute hourglass figure with that!' uh yeah no. it looks like i have fake boobs! so weird. i would have to ONLY wear that bra for it not to look so weird, all the time. you can't wear it. and not wear it the next day! seriously. but i did want one of their zebra bra's sooo bad! but it was like fourty bucks. ugh. =( someone buy me a cute zebra bra from vickies, please. then i tried to get a cover for my phone, but i didn't like any of them. i wanted the zebra one, but it was orange and not pink. uh no thank you. i'm not an orange girl. hmm. i came home and taylor asked if i had been crying, i replied 'nope not yet. why' he was like 'you can talk to me if you want! i'm here! i'll be here for a while!' hahaha. awh so sweet, just like his lastname. sweet. so fitting, sometimes! ha. came in. everyone was having dinner. i didn't eat dinner, no appetite. mom kind of got mad, she says 'you better not be starving yourself! you're already skinny' but she did say i looked skinnier. ha. hmm. yeah i need those extra pounds off. but i'm not starving myself! i eat plenty. mick helped me with my phone and then my daxie called me. and we talked for a bit. i love him. mhmm. it was nice. even if he does play bubble popping games while on the phone with me. ha. well. now that its past 12:40 am. and i have a doctors appointment in the morning AND i dont feel good, i think i'm catching something. i suppose i should probably go to bed. butter says hello. and that he loves you, as well as i do.

goodnight fellas.

monday 5 . 17 . 1o .

i attempted to post this from my phone. it wouldn't work. so weekend was a blast, with exceptions to sunday night. locked my keys in my car friday night at angies when i first got there. cameron and dax finally got it open around 9:30. well dax did. saturday was good. this weekend def. helped me realize how much i really do love my boyfriend. and i can gladly still say my boyfriend, because he still is. =( sunday night was gosh awful. i didn't sleep at all. monday i couldn't eat. no appetite. so dad finally made me eat half of a grilled cheese sandwich. cried to mommy about everything. cried to the point where she was just yelling 'breathe! breathe!' over and over. =( no bueno. tuesday morning now and i'm headed to work. my eyes are still swollen. but i'll write more later. bye babies.