june 17. 2o11. friday.

wow. what a freaking crazy two weeks. last week i ended up working OVERTIME. i didn't end up getting home til 11 or 11:30 at night. let's just say my check, was pretttty nice. but it was not very nice for the canyon drive that late at night. luckily i survived.

this week i worked monday 9:30-7. tuesday 9:30-8. off wednesday. thursday 9:30-8. and friday 10:30-7. AND i work tomorrow 10-who knows when. i've been doing returns at work lately whenever they need basically. and its been at least once a week for the past few weeks. well. thursday this is what angie's side office looked like. and yes i had it on both sides of me and the desk i was sitting at. i had to climb over all those boxes to get to the chair, which couldn't move because there was so much crap.

what a pain, i tell you. sorting all those. figuring out if its insurance, hmo, or medicare. full card or cycle. return to shelves or destroy. yeah. its very time consuming. the only enjoyable thing is that i get to be in my own room without loud mouth people bothering me. ha. yes. its enjoyable most of the time. other times i'm like dang it. put me there later when its slow. not now when i could actually be doing stuff. for instance, today, friday. it was sooo slow. i kept saying 'so why exactly did you need me to pick up friday's? its like super slow' i returned 4 BIG boxes of medications to the shelves. it was so slow. then i told kami 'yeah good thing i came in today, or you guys would have been screwed it would have been so busy. but i saved the day' ha. joking of course. i am however worried about what that brings for tomorrow. although the pharmacist-o selection is thee best tomorrow. danny & kevin. which causes for a celebration. because last saturday i worked was hell. bob and todd. what sucker selection could i have received. so i am quite excited for tomorrow. and the staff is well selected. kim tyson cameron and i. no complaints.

so i've been quite into picking flowers lately and pressing them. so i also notice the flowers more often. well wednesday i went to this bird aviary place. it was disturbing in the fact that there were dead bunnies and rats and chickens for the owls to eat. but what would have been even worse is actually seeing them eat it. ha. but i saw these pretty flowers. they were really pretty but i was afraid to pick them with all the workers walking around. ha.

they would have been perfect pressing flowers. except they're a little small. but still super pretty. i dont think i've ever seen them before. hence why i like them so much. home life has been rough. and that's all i'm going to say on the matter. please children, wait until you're grown up to get married. enjoy your young adult years. really.

well. since its midnight ish. and i still have to you know, get up and work early in the morning. i shall go to bed. . . if i can. i had the worst headache all day today. i took 400mg of ibu every four hours. finally danny told me to take 1000mg of tylenol in addition to my ibu because nothing was working. it didn't work either. i came home and took more ibu and fell asleep on the couch. i felt better when i woke up. i think my body & mind has just had enough of the past few days. done done done. seriously. . .

o6.o5.11. sunday.

i found this amazing blog last night. and read it forever. it was very insightful. i enjoyed it tremendously. this girl, divorced four months after she was married in the temple. how she didn't want to disappoint anyone when she did so. etc. really a great blog. anyways. . .

this past week was. . . alright. worked monday, tuesday, thursday, & saturday. wednesday was awfully boring. i hate sitting at home doing nothing, home alone. so on friday i made my way to syracuse for the night. <3 oil changed by taylor. rock chip repaired. brownies, made two sets. ha. both didn't work out as i planned. but apparently they're good. or so i've been told. ha. i haven't tried them yet. lunch with jess. oh how i've missed her. i love that girl. i wish i would have been able to spend more time talking. but i had other plans. which i was late to. park and walked the track and picked flowers. learned how to skip rocks. well. i attempted. failed at about 308402 rocks. but successfully skipped three! ha. that's a start. went to the shop after and hung out with taylor and james. they make me giggle. 'does taylor mean to wiggle his butt when he walks or is he trying to keep his pants up?' hahahaha. =) it was a great friday, for sure. except that taylor sat on my flowers i picked. ha. kents grocery store with momma. then home. tomato soup and grilled cheese. watched this country idol show afterwards with thee family. worked saturday. what an awful saturday. that's all there is to say about it.

this week. i work monday. tuesday. wednesday. thursday. all either 10.5 hour shifts or 8.5 hour shifts. add two hours driving time onto those though. blah. and all scheduled til 8. its a bitter sweet thing. i suppose. mommy and mike are coming up to see us today. and have lunch and play games and such. it'll be nice having them here. well. i'm out for now.

sunday. 5. 22. 11.

you know those days when you wish it was all like it used to be a year ago.
yepp. its one of those days.

alskjflsk.

this is so hard. . .

please get better life, really.

wednesday. o5 . 11 . 11 .

well. this is my first day off after a four day week. saturday, sunday, monday, and tuesday. they about killed me. monday being the worst. saturday and sunday i worked with danny being the pharmacist. which was great! and i enjoy working with kevin, kim, and tyson on saturday's as well. wish jenny was still working on our saturdays though! sunday, danny and i car pooled. I drove. which allowed me to go to jordy's house on my lunch break and talk to him on the phone for mothers day. =) thank you Erica for inving me over. you'll never know how much that meant to me. and thank you danny for allowing me to go. i really owe him. no other pharmacist would have let me, i'm sure.

finals went well. i think. well. my math final i KNOW did. i got ABOVE the average. and i ranked top 1/4 of my class, or something like that. which is amazing actually. i studied my butt off for that final. went in and felt like i did terrible. and ended up doing sooo good!! so excited! we'll see what my other grades are. So far i'm only unsure about my psychology class and psychology lab credit. which i'm iffy worried about. psychology is lame though. i kind of just gave up in that class. i hated it. behavior analysis, never take that ever. ha. word of advice.

work has been going well. considering how much i hate that place, or have hated that place in the past. i suppose i should say. a new tech student came yesterday, she was well. . . let's just say she'll probably annoy me and we'll end up butting heads if i work with her too often. she already annoyed me just working with her yesterday. for instance finasteride, girls should not touch. so i tell her 'don't touch that, just pass it along' so she goes and reads the bottle. it says 'if pregnant do not touch' but theres just a general rule at work that girls dont touch that, period. pregnant or not. so she sits and says 'i'm not pregnant.' blah blah blah. i wanted to be like 'then touch it. see if i care what happens to your future babies' and she just makes comments which someone that is new probably shouldn't make until they fully know the other person. ha. i'm sure dax and my mom hate whenever i work. because i come home and vent to them. or i call my mom on the phone after working all day and vent to her about the bothersome things at work. anyways. yesterday at work, jeff was sorting the shelves out. and i corrected him on where a certain medication needed to be. amiodarone. to be correct. he had it AFTER amlodipine. i was like 'uhh. that is not right.' so after i complained that it was not alphabetical he was like 'chirelle's being a jerk!!' let me remind you i am like 5 foot 2. and jeff is like 6 foot 4. hahaha. it was silly. i was like 'JEFF! i was trying to help you with your ABC's!' anyways. work yesterday was better than monday.

monday was ewe. i had to type all day, which was bothersome from the beginning because i felt like i was bugging everyone. and i hate asking for help. i know its something that everyone needs to do to better their working skills. but i hate it. and then i got yelled at by a nurse over something that danny had already sent. and blah blah blah. well. we sent it twice because bob resent it. after getting yelled at. i was so done with the day. then everytime i made a mistake i heard 'chirelllllle chirellllle' after monday i will probably change my name and not let anyone know of my new name. that way it can not be oversaid. ha. i know it was a learning process but. i was sooo done. once six o'clock came. i was soo out of there!

anyways. its nice to have a day off such as today. i have nothing planned. except eventually getting ready and showering. until then. i will. . . do nothing. hahaha. maybe make some bows later tonight? maybe watch 16 and pregnant? but probably just do a whole lot of nothing because i work again tomorrow. ha. and i enjoy doing a whole lot of nothing on my days off.

<3 chireller bellers.

monday. may 2 . 2o11.

well. its finals week, and what better way of procrastinating studying than blogging right?! =) i already went to a study group this morning with heidi and ali for psychology. hopefully if i review a tad bit more i'll be okay. i'm so done with that class though. seriously, i'm done with psychology. show me something new and no more stupid procedure problems. math review tonight 7-9. i WILL be attending. i feel so much better about math this semester than last. thanks danny for helping me out at work on lunch breaks. and taking my math book home to review and reteach yourself, just so you can teach me. what a champ! hahaha. so hopefully that'll go over well. I did receive my FCHD 3350 financing class grade yesterday after my online final. =) A! whooow. yeah thats a three thousand level class, and i received an A. the other day dax and I were looking over classes for fall semester. and I was like 'i'm in that financing class' he's like 'uh chirelle, that's a 3000 level class, those are harder. I dont think your financing class is that class' i'm like yes huh. well come to find out i was right. =) whoow for being financing smart. hahaha. final tonight, marriage and family diversity final. and then psychology final wednesday and math final thursday. which my math final got me out of going to work on thursday, score. =) its definitely a bitter-sweet celebration.
so last friday being the last day of classes for spring semester, usu brought in sean kingston to perform. his most famous song 'you're way too beautiful girl. that's why it'll never work. you make me suicidal suicidal.' that song. yes you know. hahah. well he came. and i have to put a list of things that should not be done at a usu COLLEGE concert.

1. no teen boppers. stay home.
2. if you have to ask your friends 'what time is it? my dad is picking me up at ten' you probably shouldn't be there.
3. if your parents have to push through the crowd in order to drag you out, you shouldn't be there.
4. definitely wear a bright neon colored vest, people think you're important and let you through the crowd without shoving you.
5. don't bring your two year old, he/she does not care and is probably freezing for your satisfaction of seeing your favorite Jamaican. stop living your college dreams, stay home.
6. if you're in a crowd pressed up against everyone and can't move, don't dance and wiggle your butt, you're probably rubbing it up on someone's leg, who does not want your butt there.
7. if you're 8 feet tall, stand in the back. do not be by your 4 foot girlfriend and her friends, no one can see past you.
8. if i can smell alcohol before i even see you, you drank too much. its not attractive.
9. if you're performing, acknowledge the side crowd, yes everyone came to see you.
10. no one cares about your birthday. so don't ask the crowd what your birthday is, especially if you're not an A list celebrity.
11. if you have to do something drastic to your hair to come to a concert, you're in need of attention, period.
12. if you have to say 'put your hands up' every three lines you say, the crowd is too tired of putting their hands up.
13. if you're a cop, don't be a jerk.
14. if i am giving you plenty of room to walk through, don't shove me just because. i promise you i WILL shove you back.
15. do not smoke in the middle of the crowd, you will hit someone with your cigarette and hopefully it will be your boyfriend.'
16. do not make out with your significant other in the middle of the crowd, go elsewhere.
    

yes. there are sixteen rules of attending college concerts. seriously though. some people's children. annoying.

so my sister recently got me addicted to www.stumbleupon.com. yes. i love it. i'm pretty sure i'm always on it. i've seen some pretty awesome things on it. basically you put in your interest and push stumble and it will bring up random internet sites with those interests. its pretty awesome actually. i recommend it. =) you'll love it.

my sister-in-law was texting me this morning asking when we're going up there next. well. i hope soon. i enjoy seeing all my cute nieces and nephews and everybody. i get along with everyone well. =) although, my face still goes red often. my mom says its because i have 'thin skin' hahaha. i swear everytime i'm telling a story or talking to anyone my face goes red. its annoying. so i told dax i was going to burn my face this weekend in my parents tanning bed so it would be red, and that would be my excuse for my face always going red. well i tanned. and my face didn't burn at alllllll. but dax's legs did when we tanned our legs after. red isn't even the color. they're like purple maroon. its awful. but silly. because i told him they would burn and all day he kept saying 'stupid lights, didn't even tan my legs. my legs are so white it didn't even work' then waBam! it did work. amusing on my part.

now time to get my study on. peace out silly bloggers.

o3.o3.11 thursday.

you know when you hit that point in your life and you think 'something has got to give'. well i've hit that point.

work is stressing me more than ever. sure, i put on a unstressed face and may complain how bad i hate it. but . . . no one understands. no one. >=( no one can take all that anger i feel on my hour drive to work and bottle it up and feel it. and feel how stressed i feel when i walk into that pharmacy and how overwhelmed i feel all day. and how annoyed i feel with everyone around. there are reasons i don't talk at work. because if i did i would not be a pleasant person. and i would easily snap. the headaches that i receive daily there, must be in the air. the medication does not take away the constant pounding of frustration and annoyance.

school is hard. i'm ooberly behind on my reading in my psychology class, marriage class, and financing class. i should do after school. but after five straight hours of school. its the last thing i want to come home and do again. and math, just gets harder and harder. i didn't spend $1,200 on TWO math classes to fail both. >=( i best pass. i can't fork out another $600.

i heard a song the other day that said something about 'every red light i stopped at i'm grateful for because it led me here to you' something along those lines. and i started thinking. hard about everything we do. every stop light we hit, delays our life a few seconds, but completely changes what's going to happen next. our lives change so quickly. i've lost so many people that meant so much to me in my life. they're gone now. moved on. now they fill the hearts of others. while i feel this emptiness for them in mine. this yearning to want such a friendship with them again. but its over. done with. i can't go back and change those things. its so hard to cope with all the trials God gives us. yet i know there are reasons for them. there has to be reasons for this feeling i have inside of me. this stressed, emptiness, overwhelmed, emotional feeling. it's like regretting those stop lights. trying to move so fast in life and hurry through those yellow lights, not wanting to see what there is waiting for you if you stop at a red light. not wanting to see how your life can change by a simple stop. . . my life has changed. in a variety of ways. its different now. nor better, nor worse. just different.

this doesn't make sense to anyone, i know. except me. i just needed to get it all out. my head feels like its going to blow up from thinking and feeling this too much.

goodnight.

never be too eager to get through the next stop light . . . it changes your life too fast. . .

December 31. 2o1o// friday.

so i went through the temple yesterday. Draper to be exact. and the lady that helped me was AMAZING! so cute! I got to go into the brides room and change in their. =) special attention. I loved it! initiatory was my favorite part! The blessings you get are so amazing! It was realllly really cool!! I'd love to go back and do them. However the session was . . . something else for sure. It was good but i was sooo lost and so confused. and technically, i'm kind of scared to go back. honestly. it was really cool to see how much support i received when i was there. everyone that came! meant soo much to me. especially because weather was awful! dax and i could BARELY get his car up the hill!! This guy pulled over and asked if we needed help! hahaha. we made it though. only a few more days til i marry my bestfriend. and BOY is it going to go by pretty fast! which is good. keep my mind off things. anyways. off for a night at my aunt and uncles with the family for new years. peace out kiddies. see you in 2o11!