11.27.12. tuesday.

Yesterday I received quite the compliment from one of my coworkers. Pharmacist Timothy told me how he noticed my self confidence had improved tremendously over the last few months. He told me he could tell I am very confident in myself and the way I present myself. He said maybe everything I have been through in the last year has had an influence on my self confidence. I was actually excited to hear this information. Knowing that he feels like I have improved my self confidence and the fact that he volunteered to tell me that, made me feel great.

I haven't noticed it but I guess in some ways I have increased confidence in myself. The way I present myself towards others. A lot of it might be that I feel like people watch what I do more now that I am divorced. I am confident in myself, knowing I tried my hardest in doing what I could to continue my marriage. I can't dwell on that. I need to move on & better my life. Dax was a big confidence boost in my life when we were together. But now, I am my own confidence boost. I do well at school & I have an awesome work ethic. I am financially stable, affording to purchase my second vehicle two weeks ago.

I might have posted about this a few weeks ago. but oh well. I'm saying it again. My bishop told me a few weeks ago that everything I have been through in the past year or so has made me grow up ten times faster than what I normally should have had to grow up.

I couldn't agree with him more. I've kind of picked myself up. I can't rely on people to hold my weight and be the keeper of my self confidence. I need to do what's right for myself.

Speaking of which, I watched Teen Mom 2 last night. & seeing Leah go through everything with her ex husband & her divorce. & seeing how she might have screwed up but she wanted to try counseling and she wanted her family to stay together, made me feel like our lives were so the same. I might have screwed up. but in the end I wanted my marriage to work. I wanted to do counseling. I tried doing everything I could. But just like in the case of Leah & Corey, Leah couldn't do it by herself. & Corey didn't think it would help. In the end, they didn't go to counseling. It was hard to see how broken up Leah was during the episode. But now, I see how happy she is with her new guy & how she's expecting a baby & how happy she is. Gives me hope for my future.

Anyways. I'm done rambling. I purchased a new car a few weeks ago. I finally brought it up to college and decided to share my new purchase with everyone yesterday. Here's a cute picture of my new car!!! I'm pretty happy about my purchase. It's basically. . . brand new.

Loves.

11.25.12. Sunday.

I've been waiting to do this blog all month long. Especially ever since I've seen everyone on Facebook post everything they're grateful for all month long. I decided not to blow up everyone's Facebook feed & just make a blog of it. Here you go loves.

1. I'm grateful for my immediate family. They help me through everything & are the ones I turn to with everything. My sister, mom, & dad are all three of my very best friends. I could not live without them. They are the best thing that has ever happened to me.
2. I'm grateful for my job. Even though I may complain about it, I am thankful that I have a job.
3. I'm grateful for my health. Thankful that I don't have any serious illnesses & can live a happy healthy life.
4. I'm grateful for my education. College may seem like a drag, but it's an experience not a lot of people get, I'm thankful for being able to go to college & not take out any student loans.
5. I'm grateful for my friends. I've lost plenty but those who have stayed have gained special places in my heart. They've backed me up from day one.
6. I'm grateful for my freedom. Thankful for the soldiers that fight for my freedom.
7. I'm grateful for my roommates. I got blessed with the worlds best roommates this year.
8. I'm grateful for my vehicles. The ability to have two different cars is a blessing not a lot of people can obtain by the age of twenty-two.
9. I'm grateful for my dog. Sugar-bear keeps me safe & fills my heart with happiness.
10. I'm grateful for places to call home. Both home at college & home at home.
11. I'm grateful for my coworkers. Even though I may not care for some of them, I'm thankful to have such caring coworkers who work so well with my school schedule & my time off. They have the ability to make me laugh when I feel like my world is crashing down. They're great.
12. I'm grateful for clean clothes. Thankful that I can wear clean clothes daily.
13. I'm grateful for my cellphone. Thankful for the ability to communicate with people from all over the country, in the palm of my hand. Technology has come a long way.
14. I'm grateful for my money. The ability to pay for things I need, when I need them.
15. I'm grateful for being able to cook. Although my cooking skills aren't grand, I am thankful for the ability to read a recipe when needed.
16. I'm grateful for sweat pants. Allowing me to stay comfy when I'm home.
17. I'm grateful for my space heater. Allowing me to stay warm for the cold winter to come in Logan.
18. I'm grateful for insurance. Without it, I might be in forever debt if anything ever happened.
19. I'm grateful for my extended family. They support me through everything & they would be there for me in a heartbeat if I needed them.
20. I'm grateful for blankets. Keeping me warm all winter long.
21. I'm grateful for my hot chocolate maker. Providing me drinks daily either to take to work or to just hangout with the roommates.
22. I'm grateful for my cousins. We are all best friends. I can count on them for everything.
23. I'm grateful for the ability to travel. I've traveled many places in the U.S. & a few places outside the U.S. not a lot of people get that privilege.
24. I'm grateful for movies. Providing entertainment and allowing me to escape from the world for a bit.
25. I'm grateful for my tablet. I'm obsessed with it. The games I can play & the books I can read on there, amazing.
26. I'm grateful for my ex husband. We've been through a lot, but I'm thankful for everything he has shown me & everything I learned from him. Although we had a rough fallout, I think he's a great person & I have so much respect for him.
27. I'm grateful for music. Making my hour drive to work & home from work feel like two minutes.
28. I'm grateful for snow plows. Especially with this upcoming winter.
29. I'm grateful for holidays. Bringing people together since. . . forever & Bringing families even closer.
30. I'm grateful for my life. The ability to live it the way I would like. Ability to make my own choices of how I want to live it. It makes me. . well. Me.

Just a simple list of the things I am grateful for. I'm grateful for all of YOU. LOVE YOU.

Loves.

11.11.12. sunday morning.

It's official. I'm doing this to prove a point. Some people need to learn that they have no right to say ANYTHING about a situation when they are unclear of what really happened in the situation. Some people need to watch their pretty little mouths (& or fingers when texting) when they have no clue what happened in someone's life. The following screen shot text messages play a perfect example of this &YES, I am willing to share this. I need to do some hazing of a certain individual who thinks he is the all knowing of MY situation.

Yes, you read that correctly. "No wonder your divorced." First off, Let me grammar check you. It's 'YOU'RE' not 'YOUR' Like "no wonder you are divorced." Learning the difference between you, your, and you're is very crucial in today's society. Now, let's get it right. Next, I wish he would have stated why he thinks he is so entitled to even say something like this. Why he thinks he has the power to do so. Because, quite frankly he doesn't know anything that happened in my divorce. & Want to know how this was brought up originally? Because I, Chirelle, wanted Obama to win. Hm. You might ask yourself how my divorce has anything to do with Obama winning? Well, it doesn't. This boy just thinks he can bring up irrelevant material when trying to 'prove his point' apparently. Which, he's not actually doing a very good job with in the first place.

This is my second text message screen shot. After I told him to stop a few days ago, I simply sent him this nice text message simply telling him to just send my stuff back. (He has some of my things from when I went to DC to see him. Some things which have meaning to me & that I simply just want back. They're my things, I deserve to have them back.) Note that I said 'Please' and wasn't being tacky or rude. Then I just reinforce wanting my stuff back soon. Apparently, Trent was under the impression that I was attacking him. Yes. See the bottom text he sent. Oh, you would like me to stop bothering you? Well, send my stuff back & that would be a done deal. Someone got pretty defensive & felt threatened all of a sudden. Let me tell you why he is so 'threatened' by me. Well. you see. One: Because I wanted Obama to win. & Well.. over half of the American voters also wanted Obama to win. Hence, why he won popular vote & not just electoral votes. & Two: because I don't think a long distance relationship is in our near future. Why? Because DC isn't really convenient for me, I'm a busy girl trying to make my life worth something, & well, I'm just not feeling it. After talking with my mom about this situation, she said:
"Some people try to attract butterflies with vinegar."

I couldn't have said it better myself. Interesting the things people do to let you know they 'care' Because believe me, Trent assures me that all he has ever done is "care." Then shouldn't we end this on better notes? You would think.

As Daily Grace would say "Trent, You've been HAZED." & Can I just say how pathetic text fighting is. CALL ME. Don't text fight me. My next future dates, will now be screened by Nate, who works as security forces in the United States Air Force. THANKS.

Loves.

11.o1.12. thursday.

Says Chirelle.

Loves.

1o.23.12. tuesday/early wednesday morning.

Went down a stroll of memory lane with pictures.

I officially feel like throwing up and crying, forever.

Seriously, why do I do this to myself?!

. . . . give it a rest, Chirelle. Give it a rest.

1o.18.12. thursday.

We finished our wall finally! It was quite the project thought. I'll show you our steps. It took. . . ohhh quite a few weeks. Because we would work on it. & then get super sick of working on it. Ha. Yeah. It looks simple, but so not simple. I was so sick of looking at the same colors, all the time. Poor Megan helped me with it. I couldn't have done it without her.

I love it & I'm very pleased. ♥ It looks fresh. People that have been to our apartment the last month and some have all watched the process of the paint swatches and they've all said 'wow that looks cool' wellllll. COME SEE THE FINAL PRODUCT!!!!!! & we have so many extra paint swatches still.hahhha. we went to walmart one day, & filled my purse up with them. hahaha. it was fun. & paint swatches are FREE! FREE DECORATION!!! anyways.

School has been going well, lots of papers, & lots of stress. I had to change my work schedule because I was drowning in work and school. So hopefully that will be better. Fall break as of today! WHOOW! Working Saturday but I have tomorrow off. Nail appointment at noon. Maybe seeing Cee Cee & taking her the baby gift we got for her. =) Yay! Hopefully she will love it. It's cute. & spending time with MY FAMILY. I love them. It was nice to have Michayla in town last weekend. & guess what? She'll be home again next weekend. It's Jason's wedding. I'm excited for him.

I might have a surprise in store for everyone soon. =) It's only going to cost me a lot of money, but will be worth it. You will see, if things play out how they should. Be excited & cross your fingers for me!

LOVES.

o9.29.12. saturday

I might have posted something about this a few months ago, but today I came across the song again. & I just adore it. It's seriously thee cutest song I've ever heard. & I just love the lyrics.
Beautiful Heartbreak by Hilary Weeks. It's a must listen to. Seriously. In the song she sings:

I used to pray he'd take it all away, but instead it became a beautiful heartbreak.

It just proves that we all have these tough trials that we all go through. Different things, every single one of us. Losing a parent, losing a baby, being lonely, being abused, being childless, etc. Those things make us the person we are today, we learn from those things. They become our beautiful heartbreaks. 'through all of the tears and sleepless nights. it became a beautiful heartbreak.'

My beautiful heartbreak would have to be being divorced. I'm accepting this, still hard. Many tears & many sleepless nights later. I know this is just a beautiful heartbreak. I have to think of the things that I'm so blessed with in my life. There are many things. I have an excellent job with a source of income & I'm going to school and gaining a better education for myself. I have a supportive family that would do anything for me & they love me very much. I have friends I know I can count on & they would be there for me any time of the day, without a shadow of a doubt. I've been blessed to be able to travel and see many different states and different countries. I've been blessed with big brother figures in my life, who would protect with me with everything they have. So blessed.

& I wish I could put out more inspirational blogs & have more inspirational words. But for now, this is all I've got. Please remember your blessings in which you've encountered throughout your life & those you continue to encounter.

Loves.